Everything I Am
x. name-siera
o. age-12
x. location-usa
..wishes..
x. poetry award
x. find my party dress
x. busch passes when it opens
o. get published
x. be able to drive
o. fall in love
x. become C.E.O of Ethan Allen
..likx..
x. poetry
o. stuffed animals
x. shopping
o. dancing
x. rock
o. hip hop
x. baseball
o. football
x. talking.. lol
..dix likx..
x. math
o. some science
x. country music
o. soccer
x. MOST cheerleaders
..friends..
x. yew all know hoo yew are
bL0gS u Sh0uLd l00k @:
*BPC*
Gen
Stephanie
Adawehi
Ferrum
Helen
Maroux
Danyel
Jennair
Walrus
Madel
u link me- i'll link u. i link u- u link me!
My BPC Awards!
Everyone
Calendar
Everything Else
blinkies/avatars aren't myne
---> cOunTdOwNs: <---
3d report card..april 13
summer break..june 17
bac to school..september 5
halloween..october 31
xmas..december 24
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it doesn't matter how many friends yew have now-- its how many yew have in the end.
life is like one big maze, you get lost, frustrated, and have fun, and when you finally figure it out, it's over.
people laugh at those hoo fall, but soon they'll be the ones to trip.
materials are nice, but aren't what the person is.
labels are for soup, not people.
yew can fool people now, but they cannot be fooled forever.
it takes seconds to hurt someone, but much longer for them to heal.
yew can try to forget the past that haunts you, but it can never leave without changing your future.
never estimate was hasn't happened.
behind the smiles, there is not always happiness, but tears that scar forever.
SINCE NOVEMVER 2004:
MAN IN THE GLASS
When you get what you want,
And you struggle for gain,
And the world makes you king for day,
Just go to the mirror and see what that man has to say.
For it isn't your father or mother or wide,
Who judgment upon you must pass;
The one whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the one starring back from the glass.
He is one the one you must satisfy beyond all the rest,
For he's with you clear up to the end,
And you've passed the most difficult test,
If the man in the glass is your friend.
You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass,
But your final reward will be the heartaches and tears,
If you've cheated the man in the glass.
-True Author Unknown
I Thx U
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Saturday, April 16, 2005
It's the way that you look at me,
The way that you hug me,
It's everything about you that drives me crazy.
It's the way I dream about you,
Every thought I have about you,
It's just everything about you that drives me crazy.
It's way you flirt with her,
That angers me,
Even though we don't go out,
It's anything and everything that drives me crazy about you.
Honestly deep down inside,
How I cannot have you,
But how I need you,
How much I want you,
Is what drives me to go on.
Sunday, April 10, 2005
*just poems will beh posted here now. ill talk about muh day n how things went n all tht in muh other new blog. tag n add ty. *here*
The silent breeze,
That seems to bless the rounded hills,
And mountains that oversee that troubled waters of the people.
The trees that are slowly destroyed,
Over vain selfish dreams,
That only support those who dream alone,
And kill only those who protest it.
The way nature screams,
And no soul sees the tears,
And no soul hears the pleads.
Taken forgranted the natural beauty,
Of the grass that we step amoung,
Of the water that we drink from,
Of the flowers that we pick of,
Misunderstood by the rest,
But thanked by those who take pride in nature.
We all stand gulity,
Of becoming distracted by the modern objects,
That distance us of who we are,
And where we come from,
But the path of forgivness,
Shall never close,
Unless it has been forgotten.
Friday, April 08, 2005
mOoD: Good.
*yAwN* Tell u all l8ters..
All the times I've screamed your name,
And you've just slowly turned your back,
And look away,
Acting as if I was never there.
I've always stayed strong,
But its starting to kill me.
It's killing me because I'm the only one who's rejected by their own father.
And finally when I forget all of the pain,
When I let go of all the anger,
And whipe away all my tears,
You start to appear.
Now you want to be part of my life,
It's like a stupid movie,
Where everyone else just seems to play along.
You want me to come out there,
Spend time to get to know you,
So we can be that family that I used to long for-
That I cried years over.
I've tried to forget all of the mistakes you've made,
Even thought I never heard one apology.
The odd thing is,
As soon as I walk away,
All the horrible things you're shouting don't matter...
All the terrible memories just fade away,
Because I have a different life now,
And the only thing that I have to remember,
Are the scars that you gave me.
Friday, April 01, 2005
mOoD: good
*yawn* still a little sleepeh.. not much going on.. ttyl. lub yew all.
I used to always fall,
And you'd catch me,
If I would trip,
You'd pick me up again,
If I cried,
You'd ease my tears,
And If I was hurt,
You'd aid my pain.
You always stood by me,
Never giving up on me,
Until finally one day I was alright.
I was finally free,
From the cage of depression,
Able to stand on my own,
Able to spread my wings and fly.
It was odd,
Because as soon as my smile returned,
Yours faded,
And now I shall gladly return all the favors.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
[x] name..siera
[x] age..12
[x] house..2 stories, outdoor inground pool
[x] siblings..none
[x] parents..divorced, step dad, real dad n vegas
[x] fav colors..blue, black, pynk
[x] hated colors..orange, dark green
[x] fav subject..english
[x] hated subject..math
[x] sign..virgo
[x] birthday..september 3
[x] hobbies..martial arts, talking (lol), hanging around
[x] fav kinda movie..comedy
[x] hated kinda movie..frustrating
[x] fav movies..lol 2 many
[x] hated movies..duplex
[x] myself in one word..flirty
[x] am i lazy..yes sometimes
[x] body..average
[x] dream of being..the c.e.o of ethan allen
[x] dream of driving..a convertable porsch
[x] am i in love..maybeh lol ;)
copy, paste, add on,post, and pass it on. =D
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
mOoD: uh.. fearful? but iight
went 2 busch last nite.. rode 2 rolla coasters. then battery ram twice. not tht much cuz we thought de park closed at likx 9ish-10ish but lol it closed it 7. soz, we got those rydes in den left. deanna seemed 2 disapear yesterday, =( i was so b0red!! lol i called her likx every hour.. imma d0 the same thing todae. cheesecake called meh yesterday!!! she couldnt really talk.. shes in hawaii.. shes luckeh.. i wanna g0!!! =( lol im jk, i get my vacations this summer.. wells, whatcha guys tink of the new layout??!! i likx it. =) Memory by Sugarcult is my music/music video.. jus 2 lets u all n0-- o! new poll. beh honest!! thx guys.. lub ya alls.
You stand so innocent,
But you honestly are gulity,
And I wanna take away all of your pain,
But I can't.
I want to make everything okay,
So you don't have to cut yourself,
And not even know why.
Because it's the only pain you can control.
You more than anything,
Right now scare me.
But at the same time I fear for you.
And through these words is the only way I can tell you,
That we aren't that different.
This all happened to me,
But Mom and I just left it all behin.
You haven't told a lie to me before,
And I trust your every word,
But just promise me that you'll be alright.
Things at home suck,
And for that I'm really sorry,
I hate that he hurts you,
And I hate that it pushes you to runaway,
And I'd hide you,
But I'd cry at night,
Thinking of what you're running from.
Monday, March 28, 2005
mOoD: content
Hope everyone had a happy easter.. well yew kn0.. if they celebrate easter! Finally got my busch pass.. =) wo0 wo0.. i've been to busch.. n their new rollE-coaster looks so cool.. =D can't wait till it's ready in may. people were nuts!! it was cold.. well kinda cold yesterday, i wore my hoodie so i wuz fyne, but n-e way, they rode roman rapids, (water ryde for those of u ho0 dont kn0) lol i rode.. uhm lemmi see: apolos n aplengist.. (omg sowrry for my bad spellin on the last 1 =P ) wells, ttyl. luv u all.
We all lose track,
Of the simple things that make us who we are.
We all seem to forget the dreams that made our future...
Just one step closer to the stars.
I've simply forgot what it's like to feel so free while dancing in the rain,
Simple beauty of the most wonderful things,
Can let me recall such warm memories of my lost tales...
The way that when I gave Nana a hug,
And I remember how I used to feel love,
How I used to help her cook,
And it'd feel so great.
I used to feel so special making someone else's cake.
The way I used to help Grandpa in his garden,
When I was little it always seemed so large,
The way my hands ran right through the dirt,
And the way I'd gently rock on his tire swing,
The way that it used to be everything.
It's the simple memories,
That keep me sane,
And if they ever left me,
I couldn't be the same,
Because it's the simple things...
That I love more than anything.
It's the way that I'd go outside,
In our old condo,
My friends and I,
We'd go around the neighborhood,
It was so magical,
All the cool places that we found,
And the things we'd know.
It's the perfect feeling of singing in the wind,
When I was little,
It seemed to clear my blame,
It seemed to numb my pain,
I cry as I remember these...
Because these are my simple things.
Saturday, March 26, 2005
Thank You.. For Keeping Me Alive
mOoD: blah.
karate wuz ok.. sumthin tht was said on AIM got me mad.. but none of tht matters as much as a certain friend out there.. so basically this is all dedicated 2 her.
shes kn0s ho0 she is.. ;)
i kno tht things at home arent that great, n im sorry. =( i kn0 theres not much i can do about tht, but i can help u. think of things that make u happy. i dont u 2 ever feel i likx i felt a awhile ag0.. depressed wit my dad n everything. i felt likx nothing anymore was worth nething. nothing made me reallyE want 2 live nemore.. n im not gonna lie-- it was hell.. but im better n0w. u have 2 block everything tht causes pain out. all the people n all the things tht make u feel bad-- u cant think about them. at all.. keep busy. talk on the phone a lot-- AIM--- uh.. ur sports! tht will help.. anything tht keeps u busE.. take ur mind off-a it. kks? think of things that make u laugh.. things that make u smile.. and ppl that make u laugh n smile 2. wen i was likx i was.. this forum rite here helped a lot.. omg so much.. other things tht helped me stay alive were music and omg poetry.. [ya the poetry part sounds geekish, but it saved me more than nething] i dunn0 but some of those things should help. everything will b okiez i swear. i kn0 it doesnt seem likx it, but i promise. dont cry nemore.. member we're 2 sexi 2 cry... =) lol i lylas always n forever. =D
~~my thx u's for keeping me alive~~
---Friends--- omg guys, thx u so much. 4 being there for me n making me feel better. i luv u all soz much.. ty ty ty ty
---BPC--- ty for letting me b myself n not ever limiting me. no judging me or labeling me. tht ment so much to me.. thx u 2 every1 there. ty adawehi for standing by me n always being there if i needed u. ty again.. =)
---Enemies--- for in the end making me stronger than wht i was be4. i still hate u all, but n some odd way ty for making me as i am today. tht goes 4 u dad.. u put me there..
---TeenSpot--- for letting me kn0 im not alone n 4 letting others help me wen i felt likx everyone else was just being nice.. =)
thx u all..
Friday, March 25, 2005
mOoD: A lil pissed
*SCREAMS* I cant get this kick in karate rite, it's getting me so mad.. uggg.. neway, todae was an iight week. I did well on mi french quiz this week, lol, woot woot!! Well, spring break is finally here =) YAY! rachel finallE got online, =) (rachel m.) notice the new song/video thingy ma bober?? haha, i've had it stuck n my head ALL dae.. since i luv it soz much.. imma get the lyrics for yew wen im all done.. 1st a poem byis me.. as always lol =)
Try To Care
Life used to be so perfect,
And least thats what it always seemed,
And all of the damn prep dreams.
If you saw me falling,
Wouldn't you warn me?
Or at least stand by and catch me?
I guess I wrong,
For ever thinking that I had something.
Something that could somehow last,
And never leave me.
Everyone,
Always telling me my problems,
Aren't bad,
And that I'd figure out to solve them.
They act,
Like nothing never really happened,
But if so-
Then how come my heart doesn't know...
These silent screams,
Listen and you'll hear,
These aren't my dreams!
They're my nightmares!
Don't watch,
Just try to help,
With your fake smiles and false cares,
Doesn't matter because when I needed you,
You weren't ever there.
LYRICS- All That I've Got: The Used
Sunday, March 20, 2005
Ideas,
Openings,
Thoughts,
Slowly wandering,
You'd never say it,
But you know it's there,
That you want to ask,
But your afraid that you'll be wrong.
You think that since I'm old fashioned,
I'm dropping hints,
You make yourself think,
That for you,
I wore that scent.
When I flirt with you,
You take it the wrong way,
And that you can't wait for tommorow to be today.
Flirts for me are natural.
I don't even know doing it,
So when I act like I'm unsure,
Don't even throw a fit.
I say no,
Because I like you just as a friend,
It makes your emotions bend,
I know-- and I'm sorry.
To Joe I acted like a bitch,
Suprised he even didn't call me a witch,
But I promise if I say yes-
It won't happen to you,
But just be careful,
Of what you think I'm doing,
And what I do.
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